Seriously, I Heard Someone Mention Masks

So on Tuesday I went home early cause I was having some crazy scary health issues, but I didn’t want to talk to anyone about it cause it fell under the classification of “lady problems” and, really, they’re better off not knowing. But on Wednesday HR sent around an email about swine flu and how if people feel sick they should stay home, so ever since then people keep asking me how I’m doing and if I’m feeling ok and then give me that weird sideways look. On one hand, I really want to alleviate their fears that I’m contaminating the office with the deadly bug du jour, but on the other, I don’t want to hold public discussions about my reproductive health. Cause, you know, awkward. I’m hoping that by next week everyone will forget all about this and maybe stop looking at me like I’m dying or something.